Friday, January 1, 2021

Should I Stay Or Should I Go?

Welcome to 2021! A new year has begun with hope and promise. Expectations for this new year are high. Yet, does a new year mean the end of a bad year and the beginning of a good one?

The year 2020 has been a struggle for the entire world. COVID-19, coronavirus, pandemic...words we wish would go away once and for all. Folks are expecting a vaccine to fix the problem, but will it? Only time will tell if this virus or one of its strains will finally disappear into oblivion and be nothing more than a mention in history books, or if the situation will worsen and wearing masks becomes the "new normal" (I hate that phrase). 

The 2020 hurricane season is over - thank God! This season has been called "hyperactive" for a reason. There were 25 named storms, nine of which were hurricanes, 10 storms hitting the U.S., five just in Louisiana. I've prayed year after year for protection from the storms, but never had I wanted a hurricane season to end like this past year's. Yes, it's finally over, but what will 2021 bring?

And let's not forget the 2020 elections. You know what? Never mind. Let's forget it. 

Personally, there have been painful moments as well. The passing of my ex-husband's younger brother, then his mother just two months later, has been devastating. His sister's double mastectomy was a shock as well, though thankfully she is recovering well, physically anyway. Emotionally she's a wreck, understandably.

The biggest and most pressing issue in my life right now is the decision I have to make regarding my home situation. My neighbor's harassment has hit an all-time high. He called the police on me five times in the month of December (that I know of); one of those times he told the police he heard gunshots in my house. Gunshots?!?! Really?!?! The lies he tells are off the charts. My only comfort is that the police in our city don't believe him. They've told me the complaints have been shown to be unfounded, which is a huge relief.

I also had to call the police on him five times this past month. One of the times he was banging on my front door like he wanted to knock it off its hinges. He was ordered to stay off my property for 90 days, but that hasn't stopped the incessant noise. These last two weeks have been horrible. As a school teacher (yes, he's an elementary school teacher) he's off from work, so he has lots of time to make a nuisance of himself. Calling the police on me, playing excessively loud music and television, pounding on the walls, and revving his motorcycle in the garage, causing our walls to shake. He often will just go into the garage to rev the motor on his car or motorcycle without actually going anywhere. 

Wednesday he started playing his rock music at 10:25 am, and played it on and off for hours. By 2:30 I was sick of it. I stepped outside and realized I could hear it across the street. I called the police. They tried to talk to him, but he wouldn't answer his door. Instead, he raised the volume on the music. Finally he did turn it off when he saw the police weren't giving up, to my great relief. Of course, that relief wasn't going to last.

New Year's Eve I planned to stay home. I'm not a party person anymore; just give me a peaceful night at home and I'm happy. At 3:00 the music started up again. I tried to ignore it but it was too loud. I turned on my air purifier to see if I could mask the sound; it wasn't working. I ran the clothes dryer and could still hear it. Even the vacuum cleaner didn't mask the noise. Then at 5:14 he went into his garage and began revving his motor. To our shock he took off, leaving the music blaring so loud my floors and walls were shaking. I lost it. I called the police in tears and told them what was going on. The officer has been to my house multiple times so he knows the situation. He waited around for my neighbor, but when he spotted the officer he took off. I know the officer went after him, but I don't know if he was able to catch up with him at any point. I was a wreck; I called my daughter and asked if we could go to her house. My son-in-law not only told me to come, he said I didn't even need to call. We are always welcome at their house. God has blessed me with the best son-in-law I could ask for. We stayed at their house till almost 1:00 am. My daughter wanted me to stay over but God has not given me a spirit of fear. I came home.

I have tried so many ways to get this problem resolved, but I feel like doors continue to be slammed in my face. I don't know if I should fight this, or sell my home and leave. My son wants the latter, but after living here only one year, I would lose a considerable amount of money. There's no way my little townhouse has appreciated enough for me to sell and make a profit; I can't say I'd break even in such a short time. But my son tells me we aren't safe here, and I'm starting to think he might be right. 

Today I spoke to my best friend and realtor. I hadn't told her what was going on because I didn't want her to feel bad knowing she's the one that helped me buy this property, but I needed to vent. I'm convinced God sent her to encourage me. She's a spitfire, is what she is. She is gonna call our attorney next week and the three of us will brainstorm what can be done. I say our attorney because we all went to the same church years ago, and we both have used him in the past. I had emailed him earlier to get advise but he was busy with a court case and said he'd get back to me. She said that's not good enough, and we will speak to him. This way I hope to get a clearer answer from the Lord, whether I should stay here or sell. If I sell, I'd have to move out of South Florida. It's gotten way too expensive to live here. My oldest son lives in Central Florida, and I would head up that way. It's not what my daughter wants to hear, though. She depends on me so much and likes that we are close by. It doesn't make my decision any easier. Ultimately I want to do God's will and not my own. I'm seeking Him for the answers I crave.

God extended His grace to me today. The neighbor played his music on and off all day, but I was able to keep busy and ignore it. I noticed that he turned on his vacuum cleaner and left it running in his entryway or garage (not sure which), thinking it would bother me. It didn't. I only realized what he was doing because I had to get storage containers from my garage to put away the Christmas decor and I heard it then. He was also blasting his television in his bedroom, but I closed my bedroom door and couldn't hear it. 

If there's one thing this situation has taught me, it's to depend on God even more. In my own strength I can't handle this; I would've lost my mind by now. "The Lord is my strength and my song, and He has become my salvation; this is my God, and I will praise Him." (Exodus 15:2). This verse is my reminder each and every day that I have to put my trust in Jesus who redeems me, in my Father who comforts me. I know God will provide a way where there is no way. I don't have to figure this life out on my own, and for that I can be truly thankful. I'm ready for you 2021. Well, my God is ready, and that's enough for me.


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