A Difficult Decision

I haven't been posting as I'd promised myself I would because the last couple of weeks have been an absolute nightmare. It's also been a time of prayer and seeking the Lord's will. 

I don't want to go into a long detailed explanation now; there's too much that needs to get done right now and I don't have the time for lengthy posts. Suffice it to say that the harassment has intensified. I've turned to my attorney for advise. He told me I have 3 options: 1 - I can file charges of stalking and harassment and have this neighbor arrested (this is the route the police want me to take); 2 - I can sue the neighbor and the HOA for intentional infliction of emotional distress and failure to enforce the association rules (making me the hero); or 3 - sell my home and get out ASAP. After discussing this with my attorney, my best friend, and my children, I've made the difficult decision to go with option 3. 

I've tried through every possible means to resolve this problem amicably but my neighbor only gets worse. My attorney explained that with options 1 & 2, I would probably win a court case, a court order would be issued, but there's no guarantee he would abide by it. If anything, his behavior shows he wouldn't, and I would be in court every month trying to force him to obey the court order. I don't have the desire to go through all that, nor do my children want it for me. 

I have prayed and prayed asking the Lord for guidance and clarity. He has shut every door, so that the only clear option is selling and leaving. It's not what I expected nor wanted; I've made this a comfortable and pleasant home for my son and me. But God has other plans. 

My home is now on the market, and it looks like the Lord is going to grant me what I've wanted for many years. I have a realtor looking for a home for us in Central Florida. I've wanted to move back to Central Florida for years, decades really. If that is the door God is opening, then I will obey and be thankful.

That's it for now. I'm off to start packing. I'll try to post but life is on the fast track right now. Prayers appreciated.

Kitchen and Dining Room Makeovers

Recently I posted about a change that I'd made in my dining room. Prior to Christmas, I had a media cabinet in the dining room serving as a buffet, except it's filled with DVD's and CD's. It looked like this:

 However, after Christmas I moved the baker's rack from the kitchen and put it in the dining room.

I fitted it with my fancy dishes and some serving pieces, and I love the way it looks - plus, it makes more sense to have this in the dining room instead of a media cabinet. But you might be wondering why I took it out of the kitchen in the first place. The answer is this:

What is this mess you ask? Why, it's a project! Actually, it's my Christmas gift from my daughter and son-in-law. They gave me a kitchen island! I'd told my daughter months before that I wanted a kitchen island because my kitchen, while comfortable and very pretty, doesn't have a whole lot of counter space. In my old house I had a peninsula that was about 8 or 9 feet long, so I had tons of food prep space. This kitchen is much smaller, with less counter space, so prepping food was a bit more challenging. I'd looked at some kitchen islands on Amazon and was considering building one from premade cabinets from Lowe's, when my wonderful daughter gave me this one. I couldn't wait to put it together! No really, I love putting furniture together and building stuff. I'm weird like that.

I was surprised at how easy this island was to put together. If you're interested, this is the Home Styles Liberty Kitchen Cart with Wood Top from Amazon. It's available in black or white; mine, as you can see, is white. It's pretty solid and well made.

I meant to take more pictures putting it together, but once I get in the zone I forget about those things. It didn't take me very long to assemble; not counting pauses to eat or take care of other things, it probably took me 1 - 1 1/2 hours. I only had my son help me twice - once to turn it over, and then again whenever I put the top on because it was too heavy for me alone. Otherwise it was really easy and the instructions were clear.

I was pleasantly surprised at the amount of storage space in this cabinet. I'm especially glad that it has three drawers, since my kitchen only has two drawers. That, in my opinion, was a design flaw by the previous owner whenever she remodeled the kitchen. Two small drawers in a kitchen aren't enough storage for silverware and cooking utensils, let alone anything else that could go in a kitchen drawer. This island gives me plenty of space so that I have things close at hand whenever I'm cooking.

Of course, what I mostly wanted this island for was counter space, and this one didn't disappoint.

On the back of the island is a flap of wood. It can be kept down this was to save space. Then, whenever I need more counter space,

it can be extended out! It almost doubles the counter space, which is wonderful!

I put it in the kitchen right after Christmas but before I'd taken down all the Christmas decor. It was a bit tight and too cluttered for me, which is why I took down my Christmas decor a little earlier than usual.

Before I put the baker's rack in the dining room I moved whatever I could into the island to see how it would fit. 

I got so much stuff in there without having it crowded. I've moved some things out and put other things inside since this picture was taken, based on my needs, but it still fits everything comfortably. Once I moved the baker's rack to the dining room, I decided on what I wanted to do next.

Originally I'd intended to put up floating shelves above the island for storage, but once I realized how well everything fit in the island I decided against it. I didn't want to put up shelves just to put random items up that had no use, other than to collect dust. Instead, I shopped my house for decor for this area.

I got this Gather sign from Kirkland's years ago on clearance. I had it over the bookshelf in the office, but I decided it would look better here. I also put the clock that was here previously just above it, and I really like the way it looks.

And, in case anyone's wondering, the media cabinet found its way into my bedroom.

I don't have a tv in my bedroom, nor do I want one, but I like how this fills in this spot. I love this media cabinet and didn't want to get rid of it, so I knew I would find a place for it. 

So I guess it's really three rooms that got a mini makeover! Just wait, there's more to come. 

The Week In Review

The past week has been a such whirlwind that my head is still spinning. Let's get right into it.

January 3 began with a police visit at 2:00 am. I was sound asleep whenever the doorbell rang, and the officer asked if everything was okay because they'd received "multiple" calls about fighting. The only people in the house are me and my son E, and we don't fight with each other in our sleep. I told him that there weren't "multiple" people complaining, just one person complaining over and over. The officer said he knew the history and left it at that, but my sleep was disturbed the rest of the night. I was not happy.

Imagine then my surprise when the police came to my door yet again, this time at 12:15 in the afternoon with the strangest request. My neighbor called them and asked if they would do a mediation, because he didn't want any more problems with me. He admitted to them that he played loud music and would leave both the music and the tv on all day to annoy me. I was originally hesitant, but the officer said she and her partner would be present, and since he was "extending the olive branch" I should give him a chance. I reluctantly agreed, telling her that I didn't trust him. She told me they weren't there to hash out the past but to try and find a way to move past it and have peace.

At first everything seemed legit. He said he wanted us to get along and not have any more problems. He said he had done things wrong but he wanted to stop. I told him I wished him nothing bad, that I didn't care if he played music or watched television so long as I didn't have to hear it, and that I was willing to forgive and move forward. There was one thing I would not do, however. I would not lie and say that I was banging on his ceiling or causing any of the noise that he insisted I was doing because I wasn't doing it. I even said to him that if I'd done it on purpose to annoy him I'd have no problem admitting it to his face, but I hadn't done it. That upset him. He pulled out sheets of paper where he'd written when I'd supposedly made all the noise but the officer told him to put it away. She reminded him that the intention was not to go over what had been done but how to move forward. I said that maybe the problem was the plumbing; I'd had to run out of the shower twice because the police were at my door, so maybe the shower was making the noise. He said no, it's not the plumbing. I asked that we try an experiment: one officer in his house, one in mine, and we'd try to figure out where the noise was coming from. His answer was, "This is ridiculous, she refuses to admit anything," so that once again the officer had to tell him that wasn't what they'd agreed to. 

One of the officers asked if I would be willing to exchange phone numbers with the neighbor so that if there were noises or anything we could communicate with each other. I was not willing to, but my son E said he would. They exchanged numbers, then the officers agreed to split up and see where the noise was coming from. The results were inconclusive; while it was true that if someone walks across the laminate floors with shoes on it can be heard in his house, it doesn't explain why he hears the sound when no one is walking on the floors. Neither the shower nor the toilet could be heard in his home. I told the officers we would do our best to keep the noise down to nothing whenever he was home and we'd see where it went from there.

The next three days were wonderful. There was no noise, no police, no complaints. My son and I tiptoed around and made every effort to keep the noise levels low. I was cautiously optimistic. Little did I know how quickly the honeymoon would be over.

Thursday January 7 my son received a text message from the neighbor at 5:00am asking if I was upset because he'd turned off his fan. My son came to my room and asked me if I was okay. I was asleep and said yes. He asked if I'd heard the neighbor turn off his fan. I told him I couldn't hear his fan on or off because I was sleeping. My son texted him back and went to sleep.

Around 10:00am my son looked at his phone and realized the neighbor had sent multiple text messages stating that he'd thought we could work things out, that he couldn't do his teaching job if he didn't get any sleep, so on and so forth. My son texted him and apologized for not getting back, but explained that we were both sleeping and weren't making any noise. He sent a barrage of text messages saying that he had a new recording method that the officer had recommended and that he now had proof of all the loud noises we were making. He said he would start calling the police daily so that they could begin to issue tickets for noise violations. My son told him he was sorry that there were noises but they weren't being done by us and left it at that.

I called the officer he mentioned and found out he'd tried to get her to come and "do something" the day before. She told him that there was no criminal activity so there was nothing she could do. She suggested he record the noise but that was pretty much it. I told her I was going to buy myself a video camera to record myself at night while I slept to show that the accusations were false. While we both agreed that I shouldn't have to go to those extremes, I could see no other way. I ordered the video cam. That night my son went to visit friends and stayed over their house, and I stayed with my daughter because I didn't want to stay home by myself.

Saturday afternoon my son received more text messages, this time with threats. He sent pictures of some recording apparatus and stated that he would be downloading all the noise going on and was forwarding it to the Department of Children Services. I was absolutely livid! My son was beside himself. He told me, "This man is the lowest of the low. He's despicable." I took my son's phone and answered the man that we would be following the officer's recommendation and blocking his number, since he clearly had no intention of fixing any problems and insisted on continuing his harassment of me and my son who is 21 years old and not a child. Communication with him ended immediately.

I could hardly think straight at that point because I was so angry. I began asking my friends to pray for me. We went to church that night and I asked for prayer there as well. It helped immensely to lay this at the Lord's feet and ask for guidance.

The next day I called the police and made a formal complaint. The officer I spoke to let me know that it is in the history that this man admitted to the noise he made and that he did it to annoy me, which is to my advantage. It's intentional infliction of emotional distress. I sent a long email to another attorney friend and I'm waiting to hear from him. The first lawyer I turned to told me he was busy with a court case and would get back to me. That was over a month ago and I don't feel like waiting any longer. If this friend of ours doesn't get back to me soon I will seek another attorney. 

This has gone beyond simply being an annoying neighbor; this is defamation of character, harassment, and abuse. I've found out since then that he did something similar to the previous owner. Whenever she began complaining of his noise he said she was an alcoholic, which was a lie. I'm shocked at how a person, a school teacher no less, can be so filled with evil. 

I'm thankful that God is with me. I still pray daily for this neighbor in hopes that God will do a miracle in his life, but I'm also preparing to prove my innocence and stand against the lies and falsehoods. God has not given me a spirit of fear but a spirit of power, love, and a strong mind (2 Timothy 1:7). I will stand up for the truth, clothed in the armor of God (Ephesians 6:10-18). If you believe in the power of prayer, please pray with me and for me. I appreciate it more than you know.      

Taking Down Christmas

 I realize that my intentions and my actions don't always line up. It was my intention to post pictures of my home decorated for Christmas. With everything going on (both good and bad) I never did that post. Now my Christmas decor is down and winter decor has gone up, but I can still share a glimpse of what I did and what has changed since.

Let's start with the living room. Compared to years past, this year my living room had very little decor. I did manage to get a few pillows and I used some items I'd had from whenever I was selling Christmas Around The World and Kingdom Treasures. 

The pup is not mine; it's my grand-dog Kuzco who stayed with me during the Thanksgiving weekend and who followed me around like my shadow. I'm really loving the black and red buffalo check pattern for Christmas time so I added this throw I picked up last year from Ross to my sectional. Most of the pillows I had before; the Merry pillow is from Hobby Lobby and the stocking pillow is from Costco.

The next decor items that I can never get enough of in my house is nativities.

These are my larger nativities; I have small ornament sized ones as well. While I do enjoy the story of Santa Claus and all the pretty items that are unique to Christmas, I never want to forget why I'm celebrating: the birth of Jesus Christ, my Savior, my Redeemer, my King. I want Him at the forefront of the celebration.

Now that Christmas and New Year's day have come and gone, I've simplified some of my decor and kept it very neutral for the winter months - though let's be honest, winter in South Florida is not as dark and cold as it is in most areas of the country. Still, our temps have gone down, the sun sets earlier, and my house is resting in wait of springtime decorations.

 The only color on my sectional now is the minty blue/green throw I tossed over the back of the longer side. The furry white pillows were another Costco find. I was in the store at the right time; whenever I saw someone had one in their buggy I went in search of them and found they were flying off the shelves. At $9.99 each it was no surprise. I had all the other pillows and together they give a soft, cozy vibe.

All my other decor stayed the same as before, but the living room looks bigger and roomier now that the tree is gone.

I tried two different looks for my dining room table this year.

The first used items from a more traditional Victorian style. I've had these for many years, from back whenever I sold Christmas Around The World. The Lloyd rabbit family in the back was from the same company. Christmas Around the World sold items by themes based on what country they represented, and this set, if I remember correctly, was from old world Britain. I really loved it for a long time, but whenever I put it on the table I realized how out of place it looked. My style is more rustic, with hints of farmhouse; far from this Victorian style with the frosted fruits and red velvet bows. I took it off and tried something else.

The two tiered dish was a gift from a sweet lady who passed away a few years ago. Rather than cakes or candies I filled it with shiny glass ornaments in red, green and gold. I then set these reindeer candleholders on either side. They are ceramic but are painted to look chippy. While not perfect, it looked much better than the previous look so I kept it instead. I've decided that the Victorian decor, while still beautiful, doesn't fit anywhere in my home, and I'm donating all the pieces (including the wreath and garland) to Goodwill. I know I could sell it, but I won't get much for it and I don't know that it's worth the hassle. 

Now that everything has been put away, this is what the dining room looks like:

There's a big change in this picture: the baker's rack that was in the kitchen is now in the dining room! Why, you may ask? Because of a lovely Christmas gift my daughter and son-in-law gave me that I'm super excited about! For now let me just say I'm loving how the dining room looks. The baker's rack is black, yet it's lighter than the media cabinet that was there before. It has all my fancy dishes and a few decor pieces as well. There's so much that has changed, but I want to save some for my next post. Right now I've gotta run to Goodwill to drop off some donations and maybe pick up some new-to-me goodies. In the meantime, have a blessed week!

Should I Stay Or Should I Go?

Welcome to 2021! A new year has begun with hope and promise. Expectations for this new year are high. Yet, does a new year mean the end of a bad year and the beginning of a good one?

The year 2020 has been a struggle for the entire world. COVID-19, coronavirus, pandemic...words we wish would go away once and for all. Folks are expecting a vaccine to fix the problem, but will it? Only time will tell if this virus or one of its strains will finally disappear into oblivion and be nothing more than a mention in history books, or if the situation will worsen and wearing masks becomes the "new normal" (I hate that phrase). 

The 2020 hurricane season is over - thank God! This season has been called "hyperactive" for a reason. There were 25 named storms, nine of which were hurricanes, 10 storms hitting the U.S., five just in Louisiana. I've prayed year after year for protection from the storms, but never had I wanted a hurricane season to end like this past year's. Yes, it's finally over, but what will 2021 bring?

And let's not forget the 2020 elections. You know what? Never mind. Let's forget it. 

Personally, there have been painful moments as well. The passing of my ex-husband's younger brother, then his mother just two months later, has been devastating. His sister's double mastectomy was a shock as well, though thankfully she is recovering well, physically anyway. Emotionally she's a wreck, understandably.

The biggest and most pressing issue in my life right now is the decision I have to make regarding my home situation. My neighbor's harassment has hit an all-time high. He called the police on me five times in the month of December (that I know of); one of those times he told the police he heard gunshots in my house. Gunshots?!?! Really?!?! The lies he tells are off the charts. My only comfort is that the police in our city don't believe him. They've told me the complaints have been shown to be unfounded, which is a huge relief.

I also had to call the police on him five times this past month. One of the times he was banging on my front door like he wanted to knock it off its hinges. He was ordered to stay off my property for 90 days, but that hasn't stopped the incessant noise. These last two weeks have been horrible. As a school teacher (yes, he's an elementary school teacher) he's off from work, so he has lots of time to make a nuisance of himself. Calling the police on me, playing excessively loud music and television, pounding on the walls, and revving his motorcycle in the garage, causing our walls to shake. He often will just go into the garage to rev the motor on his car or motorcycle without actually going anywhere. 

Wednesday he started playing his rock music at 10:25 am, and played it on and off for hours. By 2:30 I was sick of it. I stepped outside and realized I could hear it across the street. I called the police. They tried to talk to him, but he wouldn't answer his door. Instead, he raised the volume on the music. Finally he did turn it off when he saw the police weren't giving up, to my great relief. Of course, that relief wasn't going to last.

New Year's Eve I planned to stay home. I'm not a party person anymore; just give me a peaceful night at home and I'm happy. At 3:00 the music started up again. I tried to ignore it but it was too loud. I turned on my air purifier to see if I could mask the sound; it wasn't working. I ran the clothes dryer and could still hear it. Even the vacuum cleaner didn't mask the noise. Then at 5:14 he went into his garage and began revving his motor. To our shock he took off, leaving the music blaring so loud my floors and walls were shaking. I lost it. I called the police in tears and told them what was going on. The officer has been to my house multiple times so he knows the situation. He waited around for my neighbor, but when he spotted the officer he took off. I know the officer went after him, but I don't know if he was able to catch up with him at any point. I was a wreck; I called my daughter and asked if we could go to her house. My son-in-law not only told me to come, he said I didn't even need to call. We are always welcome at their house. God has blessed me with the best son-in-law I could ask for. We stayed at their house till almost 1:00 am. My daughter wanted me to stay over but God has not given me a spirit of fear. I came home.

I have tried so many ways to get this problem resolved, but I feel like doors continue to be slammed in my face. I don't know if I should fight this, or sell my home and leave. My son wants the latter, but after living here only one year, I would lose a considerable amount of money. There's no way my little townhouse has appreciated enough for me to sell and make a profit; I can't say I'd break even in such a short time. But my son tells me we aren't safe here, and I'm starting to think he might be right. 

Today I spoke to my best friend and realtor. I hadn't told her what was going on because I didn't want her to feel bad knowing she's the one that helped me buy this property, but I needed to vent. I'm convinced God sent her to encourage me. She's a spitfire, is what she is. She is gonna call our attorney next week and the three of us will brainstorm what can be done. I say our attorney because we all went to the same church years ago, and we both have used him in the past. I had emailed him earlier to get advise but he was busy with a court case and said he'd get back to me. She said that's not good enough, and we will speak to him. This way I hope to get a clearer answer from the Lord, whether I should stay here or sell. If I sell, I'd have to move out of South Florida. It's gotten way too expensive to live here. My oldest son lives in Central Florida, and I would head up that way. It's not what my daughter wants to hear, though. She depends on me so much and likes that we are close by. It doesn't make my decision any easier. Ultimately I want to do God's will and not my own. I'm seeking Him for the answers I crave.

God extended His grace to me today. The neighbor played his music on and off all day, but I was able to keep busy and ignore it. I noticed that he turned on his vacuum cleaner and left it running in his entryway or garage (not sure which), thinking it would bother me. It didn't. I only realized what he was doing because I had to get storage containers from my garage to put away the Christmas decor and I heard it then. He was also blasting his television in his bedroom, but I closed my bedroom door and couldn't hear it. 

If there's one thing this situation has taught me, it's to depend on God even more. In my own strength I can't handle this; I would've lost my mind by now. "The Lord is my strength and my song, and He has become my salvation; this is my God, and I will praise Him." (Exodus 15:2). This verse is my reminder each and every day that I have to put my trust in Jesus who redeems me, in my Father who comforts me. I know God will provide a way where there is no way. I don't have to figure this life out on my own, and for that I can be truly thankful. I'm ready for you 2021. Well, my God is ready, and that's enough for me.