Should I Stay Or Should I Go?

Welcome to 2021! A new year has begun with hope and promise. Expectations for this new year are high. Yet, does a new year mean the end of a bad year and the beginning of a good one?

The year 2020 has been a struggle for the entire world. COVID-19, coronavirus, pandemic...words we wish would go away once and for all. Folks are expecting a vaccine to fix the problem, but will it? Only time will tell if this virus or one of its strains will finally disappear into oblivion and be nothing more than a mention in history books, or if the situation will worsen and wearing masks becomes the "new normal" (I hate that phrase). 

The 2020 hurricane season is over - thank God! This season has been called "hyperactive" for a reason. There were 25 named storms, nine of which were hurricanes, 10 storms hitting the U.S., five just in Louisiana. I've prayed year after year for protection from the storms, but never had I wanted a hurricane season to end like this past year's. Yes, it's finally over, but what will 2021 bring?

And let's not forget the 2020 elections. You know what? Never mind. Let's forget it. 

Personally, there have been painful moments as well. The passing of my ex-husband's younger brother, then his mother just two months later, has been devastating. His sister's double mastectomy was a shock as well, though thankfully she is recovering well, physically anyway. Emotionally she's a wreck, understandably.

The biggest and most pressing issue in my life right now is the decision I have to make regarding my home situation. My neighbor's harassment has hit an all-time high. He called the police on me five times in the month of December (that I know of); one of those times he told the police he heard gunshots in my house. Gunshots?!?! Really?!?! The lies he tells are off the charts. My only comfort is that the police in our city don't believe him. They've told me the complaints have been shown to be unfounded, which is a huge relief.

I also had to call the police on him five times this past month. One of the times he was banging on my front door like he wanted to knock it off its hinges. He was ordered to stay off my property for 90 days, but that hasn't stopped the incessant noise. These last two weeks have been horrible. As a school teacher (yes, he's an elementary school teacher) he's off from work, so he has lots of time to make a nuisance of himself. Calling the police on me, playing excessively loud music and television, pounding on the walls, and revving his motorcycle in the garage, causing our walls to shake. He often will just go into the garage to rev the motor on his car or motorcycle without actually going anywhere. 

Wednesday he started playing his rock music at 10:25 am, and played it on and off for hours. By 2:30 I was sick of it. I stepped outside and realized I could hear it across the street. I called the police. They tried to talk to him, but he wouldn't answer his door. Instead, he raised the volume on the music. Finally he did turn it off when he saw the police weren't giving up, to my great relief. Of course, that relief wasn't going to last.

New Year's Eve I planned to stay home. I'm not a party person anymore; just give me a peaceful night at home and I'm happy. At 3:00 the music started up again. I tried to ignore it but it was too loud. I turned on my air purifier to see if I could mask the sound; it wasn't working. I ran the clothes dryer and could still hear it. Even the vacuum cleaner didn't mask the noise. Then at 5:14 he went into his garage and began revving his motor. To our shock he took off, leaving the music blaring so loud my floors and walls were shaking. I lost it. I called the police in tears and told them what was going on. The officer has been to my house multiple times so he knows the situation. He waited around for my neighbor, but when he spotted the officer he took off. I know the officer went after him, but I don't know if he was able to catch up with him at any point. I was a wreck; I called my daughter and asked if we could go to her house. My son-in-law not only told me to come, he said I didn't even need to call. We are always welcome at their house. God has blessed me with the best son-in-law I could ask for. We stayed at their house till almost 1:00 am. My daughter wanted me to stay over but God has not given me a spirit of fear. I came home.

I have tried so many ways to get this problem resolved, but I feel like doors continue to be slammed in my face. I don't know if I should fight this, or sell my home and leave. My son wants the latter, but after living here only one year, I would lose a considerable amount of money. There's no way my little townhouse has appreciated enough for me to sell and make a profit; I can't say I'd break even in such a short time. But my son tells me we aren't safe here, and I'm starting to think he might be right. 

Today I spoke to my best friend and realtor. I hadn't told her what was going on because I didn't want her to feel bad knowing she's the one that helped me buy this property, but I needed to vent. I'm convinced God sent her to encourage me. She's a spitfire, is what she is. She is gonna call our attorney next week and the three of us will brainstorm what can be done. I say our attorney because we all went to the same church years ago, and we both have used him in the past. I had emailed him earlier to get advise but he was busy with a court case and said he'd get back to me. She said that's not good enough, and we will speak to him. This way I hope to get a clearer answer from the Lord, whether I should stay here or sell. If I sell, I'd have to move out of South Florida. It's gotten way too expensive to live here. My oldest son lives in Central Florida, and I would head up that way. It's not what my daughter wants to hear, though. She depends on me so much and likes that we are close by. It doesn't make my decision any easier. Ultimately I want to do God's will and not my own. I'm seeking Him for the answers I crave.

God extended His grace to me today. The neighbor played his music on and off all day, but I was able to keep busy and ignore it. I noticed that he turned on his vacuum cleaner and left it running in his entryway or garage (not sure which), thinking it would bother me. It didn't. I only realized what he was doing because I had to get storage containers from my garage to put away the Christmas decor and I heard it then. He was also blasting his television in his bedroom, but I closed my bedroom door and couldn't hear it. 

If there's one thing this situation has taught me, it's to depend on God even more. In my own strength I can't handle this; I would've lost my mind by now. "The Lord is my strength and my song, and He has become my salvation; this is my God, and I will praise Him." (Exodus 15:2). This verse is my reminder each and every day that I have to put my trust in Jesus who redeems me, in my Father who comforts me. I know God will provide a way where there is no way. I don't have to figure this life out on my own, and for that I can be truly thankful. I'm ready for you 2021. Well, my God is ready, and that's enough for me.

2014 Comes To An End

It seems like this year went in a blur.  I know, everyone says that every year, but there's something about getting older that makes it more real.  My babies growing up, my hair growing whiter, my waistline growing in the wrong direction...well, at least I can work on some of those items.  One thing I can say with a big smile on my face:  I did it.  I blogged everyday this month.  I didn't think I'd do it, because I couldn't figure out what I would blog about.  In the end I decided to use my blog for what I'd originally intended it, which was a daily diary.  I would write about what went on during my day, and if it was a boring day I would write that.  Instead, I found that there was plenty to write about.  Life isn't all that boring ya'll!  There are always funny stories, mini-adventures and minor mishaps to write about, even on the quietest days.  I think I'm gonna enjoy looking back at what was going on during December 2014.

After my daughter had returned the Bare Minerals Starter Kit I'd bought her and gotten her store credit, she wondered about what she would get with the $45 left on the card (she had purchased a brush but Ulta was out of stock on almost everything because of the Christmas rush).  This morning as I was waking up and thinking about it being the last day of the year, I remembered I had reward points with Ulta which I could redeem for a $3 credit.  I know it isn't much, but they expire today (hence why I remembered them today).  I told my daughter she was welcome to use them since I wasn't going to be ordering anything from Ulta today and I didn't want the points to go to waste.  (She'd had points too, but she used them the day she bought the brush).  My daughter then went online and for the next 3 hours looked over and tried to decide what she wanted to purchase.  My daughter is a very intelligent young lady, but she doesn't do well with options.  She will second-guess herself and go back and forth trying to make a decision.  She called me over several times to look at this or find out about that.  I think by the end she was mentally exhausted, but she finally came up with a shopping bag with $58 worth of products.  As she went through the checkout process, she came to the payment section and keyed in the number on the card the store had given her.  It asked for a pin number.  We looked all over the card but there was none.  She hadn't been given one at the store either.  We both checked the website looking for where this infamous pin number was found, but to no avail.  Finally, I called Ulta's customer service number that was on the card.  It was a wrong number :P.  So I looked up the number on the website and called.  Finally I got through to a customer service rep, who explained that store credits cannot be used for online orders.  Gee, thanks for telling me.  Three hours of searching gone down the drain, along with my $3 worth of points.  Oh well.  Ce la vie.

For the last day of the year I went with a traditional meal:  roast pork.  Or as my son calls it, roast beast (a la Grinch).  It spent 3 1/2 hours in the oven.  I hope that the whole house smelled delicious.  I don't know because I woke up with a stuffed up nose.  Allergy season, ugh!!  I know several people have been complaining about the same thing.  It's not supposed to be this hot and muggy at the end of December.  It throws everything off.  The whole day was cloudy and gloomy, too.  No rain, just clouds and gloom.  It's like I'm not really in Florida.  This isn't what Florida is supposed to look like.   Anyway, getting back to the pork; let me just say the taste was off the charts!  It took me back to my childhood.  Yeah, that good.  We had the pork with white rice, pinto beans, and french fries, because I forgot to make salad or anything else.  That's what allergies do to me.  They mess up my brain.

I decided that, even though we weren't going anywhere or doing anything special, I would still fix myself up.  I showered and washed my hair, did my makeup using the Dazzle colors from my Bare Minerals kit, and blow dried my hair.  It turned out beautiful!  Why is it my hair always looks best when I have nowhere to go?!  I used the eye primer from Bare Minerals that I'd used Christmas Eve, the Gold Nugget one, but this time I used a teeny tiny amount.  It was about the size of a pinhead.  The amount was perfect.  It went on like a golden bronze color all over my lid and above the crease.  Once again I realized that when it comes to Bare Minerals, less is more.  I did a smokey eye but not a very dark one.  Getting older means smoked out eye makeup looks aging.  Along with the gold nugget, which can be used as a primer and an eye color, I used Tantalize which is sort of a charcoal brown colored powder eyeshadow.  I put it on the lid and blended it up just above the crease, then used it as a liner on my bottom lashes.  I lined my top lashes with the black eyeliner that came with the Dazzle kit.  It looks gorgeous!  I've always liked bold eye colors, but I find I'm more drawn to neutrals now.  This color is a cross between a neutral and a bold look, and I'm quite pleased with it.  I will remember 2014 as the year I was introduced to Bare Minerals and fell in love with makeup all over again.

We're staying up late to await the arrival of the new year.  We couldn't go to sleep if we wanted to; our backyard neighbor is doing some really loud fireworks in their yard.  Poor Molly is scared to death with all the noise :-(.  I guess it's not a bad thing.  I can stay up watching past episodes of the Tonight Show - that Jimmy Fallon is a funny guy!  I watched the episode with Carrie Underwood where she sang her newest hit, Something In The Water.  The lyrics to that song really touched my heart!  She's an amazing singer with incredible talent and a heart for Jesus.

That's gonna be it for 2014.  God bless our nation, my family, my friends, and you, whoever and wherever you are.  Jesus loves you.  Have a safe, happy, and blessed New Year.