August Challenge - Question 3

I've just been to Marybeth Whalen's blog and found another interesting question that I want to ponder on. This is the 3rd question for me, the fifteenth on her blog.

What did you want to be as a child? How was that desire an indicator of the person you'd become? If you have kids, write about how you can foster those desires (to help, to teach, to nurture, etc.) in them.

I grew up in the 60's and 70's. My mom was a stay-at-home mom, as were many of the moms at the time, though the tide had already begun to change in the 60's and less women were staying at home with their children. My father refused to allow my mother to work outside the home, and with 4 children I can say my mom had her hands full anyway.

My mother taught me the art of homemaking from a young age. I would get up on a chair to help wash dishes, and remember vividly burning my fingers trying to iron clothes at age 5. Sewing and crocheting were part of my "curriculum", though I never excelled in either. Cooking was much more productive. I was in the kitchen on my own by age 9. It started with simple things, frying eggs, boiling pasta, making pancakes. By the time I was 14 I could prepare an entire meal for the family with little to no help from my mother.

When I turned 14 my mother took a nasty fall and was in bed with a herniated disc for a couple of weeks. Being the oldest, I was in charge of taking care of my mother and my younger siblings, and running the household. I hadn't realized until then how much my mother had taught me. I would get up early in the morning, prepare breakfast for myself, my brother and sisters, and my mom, and make something for my mom's lunch so she wouldn't have to get up for anything. I would see the younger kids off to school and head off to high school myself. When I got home, I had to finish my homework quickly so I could make dinner, help the younger kids with their homework, feed them, feed my mom and dad when he got home from work, clean up, get some laundry done, and prepare for the next day. It was exhausting work, but at the same time it was satisfying. I was helping my family and making sure everything ran smoothly. I knew then that this was the path I wanted to take. I didn't care about a career or making lots of money. I wanted a home for myself, my own mini corporation if you will.

Of course, things don't always go the way we plan. Until 3 years ago, I worked to help support my home and family. It was never what I would call a career; my career was motherhood, and I've enjoyed it more than any amount of money I could have ever earned. Honestly, I worked because I felt I had to, and on some occasions I did, but I didn't love it. I made the best of it and kept in mind I was doing it for my family.

I'm thankful God gave me the opportunity 3 years ago when I lost my job, to stay home and just be a homemaker. I know many feminists consider this a step-down, but I see it quite differently. For years I worked so that others could make money and live comfortably. Now I work to keep my family comfortable. It brings me great joy to serve my loved ones, no matter how menial the job may seem.

I'm also thankful my own daughter has learned many of the skills my mother taught me. While I didn't have her ironing clothes at age 5, she does know how to prepare a meal, clean up, do laundry, simple sewing, maintain a household budget, decorate...her friends laugh at how domestic she is, but they also are impressed with her abilities. I don't tell my daughter she has to be a homemaker if she wants to do something else. She has to follow the path God lays out for her. But I'm thankful knowing she's prepared to take care of a family one day, and I know she too will experience great joy in doing so.