Summer 2017

The summer of 2017 was normal for me in some ways,  but that doesn't mean there weren't changes going on, changes that affected my household. I was reminded that my babies are grown up, a fact that brings joy and sorrow at the same time. There's that part of me that wishes they were still little, even though I'm proud of who God has made them into.

My daughter was given the opportunity of a lifetime: to work at a day camp in Israel! She would be away for one month, from the end of June to the end of July.  I was both excited and terrified. She was going with a group of ladies from work, which gave me some peace, but there's always trouble in Israel unfortunately. Still, to be in the Holy Land, to walk the same cities and towns that Jesus walked with His apostles, to minister to the Israeli children, was a dream come true. I wouldn't object to her going, but I was going to be on my knees for a whole month praying for her safety.

At the same time, my oldest son had some exciting news. His best friend's girlfriend had a job offer in Central Florida. They were going to be moving up, and wanted to know if my son R would like to join them as their roommate. R had lived a little over a year in Central Florida when he and his sister were in school, but he'd come back home after she left because it was too lonely for him on his own. He often commented that he wanted to go back to live there one day. He liked it much more than South Florida. Now he had the opportunity, and he was going to take it. That was a bittersweet moment for me. I knew this was what he wanted and he'd probably have more chances of growth at his job in Central Florida. Oh, but to not have my baby close by everyday was breaking my heart! Of course, I was quickly reminded that he wasn't leaving the country or even the state. We could still visit him, and I felt that this was going to be a change for the better. 

I was off work for a week in mid June, then the following week R was in Central Florida looking for a place to live and interviewing so he could transfer from his job. He and his roommates made great progress in the two days they went up. Two days after they got back, A left for Israel. I'm not ashamed to admit I cried my eyes out even though I was happy for her. That week was an emotional roller coaster ride.

The next three weeks were filled with packing and decluttering. They didn't have much to take with them; they'd all been living with their parents, so they had no household items to speak of and very little furniture. I decided to give them my recliners. We had bought a set of recliners along with a reclining couch some 12 years earlier, and they were still in great condition. They needed furniture, and I needed a change. Since J had moved out I had replaced some of the furnishings in the home, not out of necessity but because of the sad memories attached to them. I wanted to be able to enter my home and not be reminded of all the pain I felt daily. My son jumped at the chance of having these super comfy recliners and I was glad to contribute to his move.

R and his friends left on July 13, and A didn't get back from Israel till the 23rd. It was me and my youngest son E on our own again for those 10 days. Just 5 years earlier my older kids had moved back home after a year in school, and now my son was moving out for good and my daughter had caught the travel bug. They were all grown up, and things were changing, but little prepared us for what the fall was going to blow in (literally!).

Spring 2017 - Virginia Here We Come!

Life continued in our house. I was working, had been working for the past two years at a tutoring center, while homeschooling my youngest son E. My daughter was still teaching but she'd decided she wanted to go back to school and receive her masters in pastoral counseling. It was a grueling schedule for her, but I'm proud to say she finished and received her degree. It was a huge accomplishment, one that we wanted to commemorate by attending her graduation ceremony at Liberty University in Lynchburg, Virginia.

I'd never been to Virginia. My son hadn't been on an airplane since he was two years old, so he didn't remember it. This made the trip an exciting new experience for both of us. We flew into Raleigh, North Carolina and drove the two hours to Lynchburg. As we went through the beautiful countryside I realized how much I missed seeing mountains. I love Florida, don't get me wrong, but it's as flat as a pancake. There's beaches, trees, parks, waterways, canals, but no mountains. Heck, there aren't even hills in most of the state. Virginia's Blue Ridge Mountains are absolutely stunning! The air was clean and crisp, the roads easy with very little traffic so the scenery could be better appreciated. How we loved both North Carolina's and Virginia's landscape!

Pictures don't do it justice. It's gorgeous!

Another thing I loved about Virginia was the people, the Southern hospitality, and oh yes, the food! We went to several restaurants and enjoyed some of the classics, like sausage gravy and biscuits:

But if I had to pick a favorite eatery, it was {RA} Bistro. The chipotle burger was crazy delicious! I seriously recommend it if you're ever in the area.

I was especially thrilled to visit Monticello, the home of President Thomas Jefferson. It was a dream come true to cross that off my bucket list.

Unfortunately it was raining that day and we weren't able to appreciate the grounds, though we were able to see the vegetable garden.

Of course, I can't forget the main reason we went to Virginia: graduation day! It was made especially memorable by the guest speaker - none other than President Donald Trump! Whether you like him or not (and I realize that's a touchy subject for many), it is still thrilling to have the current President of the United States speaking at your graduation. It was a very lovely speech, focused on the students and not on himself which I greatly appreciated.

I am one proud mama!

If I had to point to a highlight of that year, this trip would be it. I loved every minute of it, even the rain and the low temperatures (because 49 degrees is freezing for this Floridian). Of course 2017 would be memorable for more reasons than this. There's plenty more to come, so stay tuned!

2017, The Year of Rest...Or Was It?

After a year of turmoil and craziness, my hope was a new year that was quiet.  I needed a break. I was mentally exhausted and emotionally drained. It was time for some rest.

The previous year, in November, I started a project that I'd put on hold due to the holidays, divorce, and time. My dining room set had gotten pretty worn. We'd bought it when we moved to the house in 2000, and after 16 years the color was faded, and it had stains and scratches. I considered buying a new dining room set, but when I saw the prices I almost fell out of my (dining) chair. For the price we'd paid for an entire dining room set (table, 6 chairs and china cabinet) all I could get was a table. I didn't want to spend a ton of money, so I considered buying something second hand that I could fix up. Then I thought, duh, I already have something used. What can I do to fix this up?

I decided to do what everyone else does when getting ready to do a diy project: I went on YouTube.  I found Cass from the YouTube channel Clutterbug, who'd done her entire kitchen using gel stain. It appealed to me because I wouldn't need a lot of special tools, and with gel stain I wouldn't have to do a lot of sanding. Looking at several more videos convinced me it was something I could do. If it worked, great. If it didn't, oh well. I was gonna get rid of it anyway.

The original color was a light maple with a Southwestern detail around the edges. The chairs had brown and black striped cushions which was the first thing I'd changed to a tan and white fabric I found on clearance at Walmart. It's hard to see in pictures but the finish on the table was dull and faded. I know that painting furniture white using chalk paint is popular, but it wasn't what I wanted. I like a classic elegant look with a little bit of a rustic touch, not the chippy white shabby chic that seems to be in everyone's house these days. It isn't a bad look, it just isn't my style. I decided instead to go with General Finishes gel stain in java, the same color Cass had used in her kitchen.

I lightly sanded the top of the table, put on the first coat, and thought, "Oh no, I ruined the table!" It looked pretty awful; so bad I didn't take a picture. It was streaky and didn't cover the original color very well. I was more heartbroken than I thought I'd be. I was really looking forward to keeping my dining room set, and it looked like it wasn't going to be.

Thankfully I went on General Finishes' YouTube channel to see if there was any way to fix my "botched" stain job. What I found out is that the first coat always looks pretty bad. As I looked at more videos and websites, I realized I was freaking out unnecessarily and I just needed to keep going. Boy, am I glad I did! The results were better than I dreamed!

The color is dark, rich, and elegant. The cushions pop against the espresso tone. It was just perfect.

I finished staining the table and chairs just before Thanksgiving. Not wanting to have the mess in my house during the holidays, I decided to leave the china cabinet alone. I picked up the project in January after putting away all the Christmas decor.

This was after a couple of coats of stain. It gives you an idea how one coat would look. The color as seen here is pretty but it didn't have the richness I was looking for. To get the espresso color took 4 coats of gel stain, and afterwards I added 3 coats of poly to protect the stain and give it that lovely sheen.

I stained the outside only, and left the inside the original maple color. I also replaced the handles. The original knobs were tiny and black, which wasn't going to show against the java. I found some really cute knobs in an antique gold on Amazon that were about $1.00 each and were absolute perfection.

Doing this project myself gave me a sense of accomplishment. The best part: the entire project (including all the materials to reupholster the chairs, gel stain, paint brushes, etc) cost a total of $250! I loved it so much I gel stained the top of my coffee table and two nightstands! Keeping myself busy also helped my mental state, which was much needed. The year was off to a good start.

Of course, life isn't perfect and my year of rest wasn't going to be either. But that's another blog post. Stay tuned!

Where To Start...

It's been just over 4 1/2 years since I last posted on this blog. On the one hand it doesn't feel like it's been that long; on the other hand, it feels like a lifetime ago. There have been many times when I thought about getting back on. Many times when I looked back on my blogging and thought, I sure do miss putting my thoughts down here. Many, many times...

Part of the reason was trouble with my login. But that, I knew, was easy enough to fix. The main reason was, I couldn't find the words. I felt like I was stuck in a whirlwind and couldn't get out. All I wanted to do was scream. I had moments when I didn't want to talk, didn't want to journal, didn't even want to think. It was a difficult time, but you know what? God saw me through it. I've come out stronger and more sure of my faith. Life isn't perfect; I don't expect it to be. I'm okay with that.

So I've decided to start blogging again. And the first question I asked myself was, "Where do I start?" I think Julie Andrews answered that best. Start at the beginning. It's a very fine place to start.

Our beloved Molly died in September of 2015. I tried blogging the following October but I was still grieving. Little did I know what was about to come next. In January 2016 my husband (whom I was separated from) came to my house and told me he was purchasing a house for himself. Not only that, he wanted me to help him finance it. Yes, he wanted me to help him purchase a house that he would be sharing with his girlfriend. I said no, absolutely not. If he wanted to buy a house he was welcome to do it after he was divorced from me, but I certainly was not going to help him. Well, after 4 years of separation he agreed to a divorce. Or so I thought.

I called my lawyer and began divorce proceedings. At the same time, the church I'd been attending for 8 years was in a whirlwind storm of its own, and it was splitting. I'd never experienced a church split, and I never want to again. It was so ugly, so un-Christlike. The church was as divided as the Senate. There was mishandling of church funds, accusations flowing left and right, and people leaving the church faster than you can say Help me Jesus. Folks I'd considered my friends suddenly stopped talking to me or kept their conversations to a superficial minimum. At a time when I needed my friends the most, they were disappearing. Talk about the worst timing ever.

My daughter had some friends at a local church and she told me I should try it. This church had gone through its own problems some 9 years prior, but through prayer and dedication it was growing and healthy. I started the transition in February, the same time the divorce papers were filed. Well, wouldn't you know it, as soon as my husband J got the paperwork he refused to sign. He called me to chew me out, saying there was no way he was going to sign anything. I didn't listen to most of what he said, until he told me I was ungrateful. It was as if he'd slapped me in the face. I don't think he expected what came next; even I didn't expect what came next. I told him off so bad. Everything I'd bottled up inside for the past 4 years came pouring out. I made it clear that this divorce was going to go through because I was not going to continue putting up with the humiliation of being married to a man that was living with another woman, and I meant it. It took 11 months from the day the petition was first put in, but in December of 2016 my divorce became final. I'm not going to go into all the details of everything that went on during that time. Suffice it to say, it was a difficult year.

In the meantime, I began to attend our new church. I'd attended a couple of churches before, but I have to say, I'd never experienced so much love in such a small building. Genuine love, that extended beyond the walls of the church building. I'm convinced God brought me to the place I needed to be at the time I needed to be there. It was slow for me; after everything I was going through, I didn't think I could ever trust anyone. It was like I'd built a wall around my heart, and I was gonna make sure no one penetrated it. Right. As if God wasn't powerful enough to take it down.

2016 was a hard, painful year. I don't like looking back at it too much. But one thing I learned, Romans 8:28 is true: "And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to His purpose." God taught me so much during that year, and I grew, spiritually and emotionally.

I think I'm going to stop there. I can't fit 4 1/2 years into one blogpost. Just looking at 2016 has been draining and comforting at the same time. That's a lot of emotions for one day! Maybe a post per week, maybe more. We'll see. In the meantime, thanks for spending some time here. God bless.

It's October Already?!

My, how quickly this year has gone by! Seems like just yesterday I started working, and that was back in February. Eight months and I'm still at it! God has certainly been good to me.

It's almost a month since we said goodbye to Molly, and I'm still not used to it. I wait for her to come out at her dinner time; I expect her to be on the rug in the evening, or in the middle of the floor where she can watch us as we walk by. It's hardest when the doorbell rings and there's silence. We knew someone was at the door even before we heard the doorbell - she was standing up, looking out and ready to bark at whoever it was that was disturbing our peace. Now it's just quiet, and we all look at each other with sadness on our faces. I never imagined it would be this hard.

This past Thursday I asked my son R to throw away the last few cans of dog food that were in the pantry. We'd gotten rid of most of her things (except for her collar, leash, and favorite toy; those are keepsakes that are dear to us), but I couldn't bring myself to throwing away her dog food. It seemed so final; I would get choked up every time I attempted to go near them. R took care of it while I was at work, and when I got home and saw they were gone, I cried again. My sweet puppy. What a large hole you've left in our hearts.

School has been going well. My son has A's in all his classes except biology, where he has a B. He's working hard in that class but his teacher is pretty demanding. Her motto is, "If it was easy you wouldn't be learning." Okay, I get it. His favorite class is Personal Finance. These are lessons he feels he will use his whole life, and I'm glad for that. We went to our credit union a couple of weeks ago, and he opened a checking and savings account. His goal is to have $500 in savings, and another $500 to build himself a computer. I'm so proud of his progress.

Between school and work I've kept so busy that I often think about blogging but can't find the time to do it. There's just so much to keep up with around the house. Right now our lawn mower is giving us problems, the master bathroom toilet is running even after I changed the mechanisms inside, I need to get an oil change on my car, hopefully I can get my hair cut sometime this month since I haven't been to my hairdresser since March...my life is on autopilot and I can't find the brakes! I'm seriously looking forward to the holidays and some days off!

I did manage to decorate for fall and rearrange some stuff so I could get a bit more organized. As part of his allowance I'm paying my son E to vacuum and help with laundry. Best money spent in my entire budget!

I think I'm gonna stop here, since I have to clean up the kitchen. Honestly, I need a break, but there's so much to do and so little time. I do want to say thank you to everyone who has sent me comforting comments and messages about Molly. You've all been so kind and compassionate. I don't have the words to tell you how much those words have meant to me.

Hope y'all have a blessed week. Enjoy each day and be thankful.

Saying Goodbye To Molly

2011 was one of the most, if not the most, difficult year of my life. I saw my world turned upside down in a matter of months. Just looking back on that time is painful. But there was one bright moment, one piece of sunshine that God sent me to help me through the storm. That piece of sunshine was our dog, Molly.

Molly appeared in our front yard in May of 2011.  She was so thin, filthy, and scared. She was such a big dog that she frightened us at first, but my daughter (the eternal animal lover) quickly brought her some water to drink. She also got some leftover meatballs, which the poor dog devoured.  I had a can of Vienna sausages, and gave her those, too.  She was clearly starving, and from the looks of her she'd probably been roaming the streets for some days.  We brought her inside our yard to keep her off the streets and out of danger.  I had to pick up my son E from school, and I promised my daughter I'd buy her some dog food as well.  I clearly remember bawling in my car as I remembered Tobey, our soft coated wheaten terrier that had died three years earlier. I didn't want another dog.  I didn't want to go through the pain of losing another dog.  But I also knew my daughter would be begging to keep her. What's a mother to do?

My son also fell in love with the dog. She was so scared, so timid, and she appeared to be very sweet, but I warned them that the dog probably belonged to someone and it was our duty to find her owners and get her back home. Which wouldn't be easy; she had no collar and no visible signs of ownership.

Within a couple of days we took her to a vet to see if she had a chip that would help us get her home. She didn't. What we did find out from the vet was that she was about a year old, maybe a year and a half at most. She'd also recently given birth. I was amazed at how gentle she was, how she let the vet do all kinds of tests and didn't complain, growl, or bite. The vet asked what I was going to do with the dog. I told her I would continue to seek the dog's owners; if we couldn't find any, we would have to decide if we would keep her or take her to the humane society. The vet immediately objected: she was sure the dog would be euthanized if we took her to the pound. She told us, "If you don't want to keep her, bring her to me. I want her. She's an excellent dog, well behaved and gentle. I will take her if you won't."  It surprised me that she would speak with such passion over a dog she'd just met.

Convincing my children that we should keep the dog would be easy; convincing their dad would be another story.  He hated the dog.  Couldn't stand having her around.  There was no reason for this other than the expense of having to buy dog food and dog stuff. But when my son E got on his knees and begged his father to please let him keep the dog, his father couldn't say no.  So the dog stayed, on the condition that if we found her owners we would give her back.  We would take care of her as long as she needed us to, but she wasn't truly ours yet.

We asked around, we looked for signs at the stores or on street lights, but no one ever came looking for her. My daughter recalled that, about a week earlier, she'd seen some folks selling American bulldog puppies not far from our house. The dog we'd found was an American bulldog mix, and she'd recently had pups.  My daughter believed that this poor creature had been used to breed and then abandoned.  We couldn't understand why: she was the sweetest, gentlest, most loving and affectionate dog we'd ever seen. She was well behaved, completely housebroken, obedient, quiet...I often said she couldn't be a real dog.  She had to be an animatronic.  No dog could be that good.  But she was, and she climbed into our hearts.  We named her Molly because to me, she looked like a Molly. She responded to the name immediately, so we suspect that her name was something similar to Molly. She quickly became a member of the family.

Within a couple of months I found out my husband had been cheating on me, and that the whole reason he wanted me and the kids to move to Central Florida was so that he could bring his mistress to live in my house. The months that followed were nothing less than a nightmare. My two older kids moved to Central Florida for school.  My husband moved out that November.  I was left alone with my almost 12 year old son, and whenever he was in school I was alone in my house, with my thoughts, my pain, my prayers, and my dog.  Molly saw more of my tears than anyone else.  She kept me company day in and day out; while I cleaned the house, she'd follow me around.  I would say to her, "I should have named you Shadow because that's what you do all day, is shadow me!"  She would look at me and smile.  Yes, my dog would smile.  When I sat down, she'd rest her head on my lap. When I'd pet her, she'd put her paw up on my leg and pet me back.  I soon figured out that when God brought her to my front yard, it wasn't so that I could take care of her; it was so she could take care of me. My daughter repeatedly asked if Molly could come to Central Florida to live with her, but I said no each time.  She was my puppy, and we needed each other.

My kids came back home in 2012.  By then it was established: Molly was ours. We loved her, doted on her, and in turn she loved us unconditionally.  Everyone who met her fell in love with her.  You couldn't help but love her.  She was just that sweet.  We did notice a strange little pimple-like growth on her belly at the time, and we had the vet at the humane society look at it.  She said it was probably nothing to worry about, unless it started growing.  "Just keep an eye on it," she said.

About a year later we noticed the little pimple had grown, and we took her to another vet (none of us wanted to go back to the vet that treated Tobey; he was never able to tell us what killed our poor dog).  This vet glanced under her belly and told us it looked like blood cancer and that he would need to test her to see if she could take anesthesia, then operate and have the pimple removed and tested, and it would cost $60 to test her for anesthesia and another $600-$700 to operate, plus have the thing tested...it was so upsetting, I could not put it into words. He never really examined her, he barely looked at her and didn't put a finger on her.  I went home raging mad because I didn't know what to do.  Within a couple of days, the pimple popped and went almost completely away. Hah! I thought. Dumb vet didn't know what he was talking about.  The little pimple would come back, but it would pop and go away, so we didn't worry too much about it.

Then, at the beginning of this year, the pimple became a growth. It got larger and redder, and even when it bled it wouldn't go away.  So off we went to yet another vet.  How I wish the first vet that had seen her was still around!  Unfortunately she'd moved out of the area.  We took her to a vet not far from our home that we'd heard good things about.  The vet was out of town so his assistant saw Molly.  Just from the look on her face I knew it wasn't good.  She said the growth had to be removed, and soon.  She also said that, from her experience, it didn't look good.  We scheduled the surgery for the following week when the vet would be back.  It was the soonest we could get her in.

In the meantime, the growth not only got bigger, it began to decompose. It smelled like death; that's the only way I can describe it. It would bleed from open sores.  It was awful.  She felt awful; we could see in her face that she was extremely uncomfortable, though she never cried.

Three days later, she had the surgery. By then the pimple had become a mass larger than a golf ball.  We held our breath waiting for the results, but deep down inside we knew.  A week after her surgery the vet confirmed our worst fears: the growth was a grade 2 mass cell tumor, and it was malignant.  Our sweet, loving Molly had cancer.  And not just any cancer.  This form of cancer was aggressive.

My kids and I had discussed this possibility.  We knew the vet would suggest cancer treatments, but we've known multiple people who've gone down that road with their pets only to regret it.  Their dogs have suffered through chemo and died of cancer anyway.  We didn't want that for our Molly.  We knew if she had cancer she would die because of it, and we wanted her to die with dignity.  So I informed the vet that we would forgo the treatment, and enjoy her while we had her.  When her time came we'd do what was best for her, and not let her suffer.  The vet respected our wishes.  He told us Molly could live anywhere from 3 months to a year.

Looking at her after her surgery, we thought the worst was over.  She came back to life again; she was bouncy, energetic, and happy again.  She was acting like a puppy!  We were convinced that she would live a long time now that the ugly tumor that had taken three years to grow was gone, and if that's how long it took the tumors to grow, we might even have more years with her! But it wasn't to be.

Within a couple of months she had another growth on her belly.  And another.  A month later there was one on her leg, and another on her face.  It was like her body was exploding with tumors.  Most were small, though, and we continued to hope they'd be like the first one.  Then we noticed that she was having trouble breathing at times.  My daughter was petting her, when she noticed that Molly's chest was swollen, and there was a rash.  It was getting bad.  Really bad.

September 11 we went to Disney World for Night of Joy, just as we had last year.  Part of me was dying to go.  I'd booked a room at the Pop Century months earlier, and we'd never stayed at that resort.  We were excited to go back to Disney, but I hated leaving Molly.  She didn't look well at all.  My oldest son R was staying in town, but he would be working all day Saturday and wouldn't be able to watch her or let her out.  Thankfully, my daughter's best friend came to the rescue, and dog sat Molly for a little while on Saturday.  We got home Sunday evening, tired and worn and happy to see our sweet dog.  It wasn't until the next day that my daughter came to tell me that she had found more tumors, and that the one on her chest was getting really, really big. Molly was having trouble getting around. Her leg, the one under the tumor on her chest, was extremely swollen as well.  She couldn't even sit for very long because she couldn't put much weight on her leg.  There was an intense sadness in her eyes.  She was constantly running a fever.  I told my daughter I didn't know what else to do, and she said, "Mom, it's time."  I felt my heart break in two, but I knew she was right.  I told her I'd call the vet the next day.

When I explained to the receptionist what was going on, she said, "I remember Molly! I'm so sorry!" It was not unexpected.  Molly impacted everyone she met in the most positive way. I asked if we could wait until Friday; I needed time to get used to the idea.  Oh, how I suffered those days!  I kept seeing how unhappy she was, how miserable she felt, and I desperately wanted her to be her old self again. But I knew.  It wasn't going to get better.  And I didn't want her to get worse.

Friday came, and I dreaded each passing minute of the day.  I went to my Ladies bible study group, but I only told one lady about it.  She got all teary-eyed and told me she loved me.  She must have seen the hurt and pain in my eyes.  Finally, I packed Molly and my son E into the car, and we met my daughter A at the vet's office.  They asked if we wanted to stay during the procedure, and we said yes.  I couldn't bring myself to leave her alone when she'd never left my side.

It was quick, and it was painless.  The vet told us that, more than likely, the cancer had spread to her organs.  We were doing the right thing by not letting her suffer any longer.  I knew he was right.  As we watched her take her last breaths, we knew we'd saved her from prolonged pain.  It didn't make it any easier.  With every short breath she took, my heart broke into more and more pieces.  How do you say goodbye to a pet that has been with you through the worst storms of your life?

I cried when our Tobey died.  It was sad, because he did suffer, and we never found out what was wrong with him.  It was rough.  But nowhere near as much as I have suffered now, losing Molly.  Tobey was my daughter's dog; he was her dad's dog.  I loved Tobey, but Tobey was independent.  He was never affectionate, and he was always getting into mischief.  Molly, on the other hand, was loving.  She was a people lover.  We would say she was like Ariel; she wanted to be "where the people are."  She was my dog.  MY dog.  She loved me more than anyone else in the house.  My daughter would get mad because she'd be petting Molly and Molly would be watching me.  She loved everyone, but she loved me most, and now she's gone, and I can't stop missing her.  There's an emptiness in our house.  Our family feels incomplete.

In case you're wondering, we won't be getting another dog.  My son's allergist made it clear: E is allergic to dogs, and Molly was contributing to his eczema and allergy symptoms.  There was no way I was getting rid of Molly; I knew she didn't have long to live, and I couldn't bring myself to give her to anyone else.  But I will not bring another dog into the house.  It's not fair to my son.  Besides, I know I will never, ever, find another dog like Molly.  She was truly the best dog in the world.  Even as the tears become less and less, I will remember her and miss her for the rest of my life.  

What's Been Going On

It's amazing what can happen in just a couple of weeks.  Life can take some crazy turns.  Thankfully ours have been pretty positive!

One of the teachers at the tutoring center recently got a job at a Christian school teaching high school math.  I was sad to hear she was leaving but happy for her new job, especially since she's getting married in October.  Little did I know how her new job would impact my family!

My daughter A has been under her father's health insurance ever since I stopped working.  She turns 26 the end of this year, which means she will no longer be covered under his insurance.  Her father has been hounding her ever since her birthday back in December, telling her she needs to get health insurance before her birthday.  She has looking, but health insurance is expensive, especially for a young single woman.  For those who think that government insurance is the answer, think again.  Even Obamacare is costly.  Since she was working two part-time jobs and neither one offered health benefits, she knew she would have to come up with a way to get affordable healthcare, and her options weren't very promising.

Her dad called her about a month ago asking once again if she had found insurance yet.  When she told him she hadn't, he told her not to worry about it, he had found a way to keep her on his insurance and she'd only have to pay him $100 a month.  Now, if I know anything about this man, it's that he can't resist a scam.  I didn't know what he was up to, but I did know one thing for sure: whatever it was, it was illegal.  He doesn't care; as far as he's concerned, it's not illegal unless you get caught.  Well, that was NOT what I wanted for my daughter.  Of course, with J, it's his way and that's that.  But he doesn't know the power of my God!  My daughter and I began to pray that God would provide her with insurance that would be more affordable than what J was insisting on offering.  Seems impossible?  Ha, nothing is impossible for our God!

A week after we started praying, I got home from grocery shopping to find my daughter extremely excited.  It turned out that the girl who was leaving had contacted her.  The school where she was going to start working needed an English teacher, someone with a degree in English, and they needed someone right away.  She immediately thought of A and asked if she was interested.  The school would take care of getting her certification.  The part that had her most excited?  The job would pay her double what both her part-time jobs paid, and she would receive 100% paid health benefits!!  She could hardly contain her excitement!  She was happy and nervous at the same time, and asked me what she should do.  I said hey, go for it!  God is sending you this opportunity, you'd best take it!  She interviewed that same day, and they offered her the job on the spot.  Turns out they'd been needing someone since the school year had finished, and no one - absolutely no one - had applied for the position.  She was the first person to apply, and school was going to start in one week.  The thought of it made her even more nervous, and she said she needed to pray about it.  She spoke to her pastor, her friends, and of course mom.  We looked into the school and the church.  This church has been instrumental in planting many of the churches in South Florida, and their ministry is extensive.  All her friends (many of them teachers themselves) told her they'd be there with help and advise.  We all agreed, this wasn't a coincidence, it was a God-incident.  So she accepted, got her training and certification, and this week started teaching 9th and 11th grade English (including an AP class) along with middle school journalism.  She is the happiest she's been in ages!  Everything has fallen into place so perfectly, that we know it has to be the hand of our ever faithful God!  We are so thankful for this new step in her life!

Of course my bosses weren't as happy as she was.  They were left without two teachers for the fall session which starts next Monday.  But once again, God has provided.  We have three new teachers coming in that got trained this week.  It was rough for my daughter, because she doesn't like to disappoint, but the opportunity was too great to pass up.  It's been hectic with her church job too, but she's such a trouper.  She's getting the work done, and getting all her school assignments done as well (she's working towards getting certified as a pastoral counselor).  God is blessing her hard work, and I can't wait to see what else He has in store for my little girl!

As for me, I've been on an organization kick - or more like a frenzy ;-).  It started in the master bedroom, moved into the kitchen where I've been organizing the pantry and cupboards, and now it has continued into the bathrooms.  I've been throwing out anything that is expired (you'd be surprised what you find hiding in a medicine cabinet) or that doesn't get used, and putting things away properly.  I've shopped at Walmart, Target, Dollar Tree and Amazon for organization tools and containers.  I've also done some deep cleaning before school starts up again, which is on the 24th.  I'm off from work this week (yay!) so I've been able to get loads of stuff done.  I'm very much a type A personality, and having everything streamlined and organized makes me feel relaxed.  I'm loving it!

I took my youngest son E for allergy testing.  Not only were his allergies getting out of control, his eczema was spreading.  Both his arms were covered, his eyes were dry and irritated, and below his chin it was starting up.  It seemed the medicines the dermatologist had ordered weren't enough, so I had to take the next step.  He had to get off his maintenance medicines for 5 days so the tests could be accurate.  It was the most miserable 5 days of his life!  He literally needed a trash can next to him to drop all the tissues he was using because he was sneezing so much.  When we finally got to the doctor's office for the tests, they got delayed because E was having a mild asthma attack.  See, the day before we'd gone to see Hillsong United in concert, and it was held outdoors in a park.  The outdoors are my son's enemies, unfortunately.  He was coughing but he wasn't wheezing, at least not heavily, so I hadn't detected it, but the doctor noticed right away.  Once he was breathing normally, the doctor proceeded with the tests.  Thankfully my son has no food allergies.  He does, however, have a ton of other allergies, all environmental.  Trees, grass, mold, plants...let's just say, he's allergic to Florida.  The doctor put him on prednisone and gave him an inhaler, along with eye drops, nose drops, and instructions for taking care of the eczema.  He also suggested I get an air purifier, which I ordered the very next day.  I'm happy to report that his eczema is almost completely gone thanks to the creams he's using (Vanicream is the best, I highly recommend it), and I haven't heard him sneeze in days.  Oh, thank You Jesus!

We found out he's also allergic to pet dander, particularly dogs and cats.  This has created a dilemma for us, because we can't get rid of Molly.  Not only because we love her, but because she has cancer, and she's dying.  The second tumor on her belly has started to grow, and we don't think she has very much longer to live.  We know no one will take her in her condition, and if we take her to the humane society they'll put her down.  We've decided to keep her until the inevitable, which J is against (he's wanted us to get rid of Molly since day one), but honestly I don't believe we will have her for much longer.  It breaks our hearts to even think about it.

Sorry to end on a sad note (I didn't realize it till I looked back) but life is like that; it has its ups and downs.  We thank God for the good, and we thank Him for the not-so-good.  In all things we praise our God and Father and trust in His decisions.  Hope you do too.